Sunday, September 26th, 2010
Issue: 48   Editor: SeanGoesToUni


COLUMN: Just Another Column. Noir
On September the 17th, Mika accepted the position of Moderator. Shortly afterwards, on September the 20th, Rod was relieved of his post. Things are changing, and I think that can only be a good thing.

If I were a moderator, and I had any love of my position whatsoever, I would be quaking in my boots right now. Bootleggers won't stand for inactive staff anymore, and it is only a matter of time before Sweetie and Riserva have their carcasses thrown into BSF's basement of ex-moderators, the players who used to care.

Okay, I have no more idea of what Riserva and Sweetie do behind the scenes than I do of the meaning of life, why bellybuttons have 'innies' and 'outies', or whether I'd rather fight one horse-sized duck or 50 duck-sized horses. But that might be ENOUGH to warrant getting rid of them; the very fact that nobody really knows WHAT they do, despite not necessarily proving that they aren't doing anything, still brings down the morale of Bootleggers, still lets players assume that they can run riot without reprisal, still creates more work for other staff in the way of answering queries in the forum.

Maybe I'm being unfair. It could be that the rank of Moderator is little more than a medal; a badge of honour for those that have already donned yellow, already done their bit for Bootleggers Customer Service. Maybe, as moderator, there is no obligation to do ANYTHING with your newfound power, and anything you DO do is considered an outstanding display of going beyond the call of duty.

Rod was not an anomaly. Throughout the history of Bootleggers, staff have been dogged with members that, at least in the eyes of the Bootleggers public, have not been pulling their weight. Moderators, Administrators, even the lowly HDOs, all seem to wither and fade in time. Being offered the staff position may be like opening a christmas present... but once you've ridden your bike a hundred times, completed that PC game, or run out of credit on your new mobile phone, the novelty wears off, as does the staff member's dedication to his or her role.

Again, I'm probably being unfair. Maybe it is normal for staff to come and go every couple of months. After all, nobody can be expected to moderate Bootleggers, day in day out, free of charge, until the day they collect their pension.

Why, I ask myself, do these members of staff consistently lose interest and never return? With the exception of 5litre and Nyxxie, nobody above the level of HDO seems to be doing anything nowadays. And according to trend, it can only be a matter of time before even the 5litre/Nyxxie duo empty their desk, steal as many company pens and mugs as possible, and slip quietly out of the back door in search of a new life herding cows in Swaziland.

Perhaps they feel unappreciated. All it takes is a glance at a random topic in a random Bootleggers forum, and there's a decent chance you'll find some Nyxxie-bashing, which some users seem to dish out like a salesman selling porn to college students. Maybe its the whiney topics, and articles like these, that make staff reconsider their options in a sudden realisation of "why the HELL am I still doing this?"

I think of the Elite Guard as a school. Being a HDO is the equivalent of kindergarten, where the young 'uns find their feet, learn the ropes, start getting some life experience, making decisions, growing up. They'll eventually, through hard work and dedication, make it to high school, as Moderator, where their responsibilites and peoples' expectations of them multiply. They eventually graduate, and leave school, their presence a mere memory while the other kids wonder "why are they so damned inactive!?". A couple may come back to teach, as Administrators... if they're brave enough.

The point of this metaphor is that being a member of staff- any member of staff- is not a lifelong responsibility. We practically expect staff to get itchy feet sooner or later. It's just a damned nuisance that when they no longer do anything, they just CAN'T seem to LET GO. After all, there are hundreds from the Bootleggers community that would give their right arm to become a member of staff. A handful of them would be bloody good at it. It's time to let them have their chance. Come on Sweetie... you've graduated now. You'll go far. Seriously, you don't want to stay here and become a lunchlady.

For the rest of us, we can only crawl around in our nappies and swallow some bits of lego. It'll be a loooong time before we ever get to graduate.