Sunday, December 13th, 2009
Issue: 6   Editor: Mika


The Ugly Truth Deuce
I somehow survived the first attempt at this column. Sure it was based on one complaint, but that was a complaint that needed to be addressed within our little community. I came to the conclusion that people who have been scammed in OC’s do not like to be called dumbasses. One person even called me an ass for my remarks. On a side note, I only saw one or two of those threads in the game forum this week. Maybe my rant worked…

It’s a new week though, which means new thoughts. To start off, what the hell is up with people signing their name at the end of their posts? Last time I checked, when you create a thread you see “ - followed by your name” which tells us who you are. When you post something, your name appears at the top of the post. Pretty sure we all can identify you by looking at your thread, post or profile. So why do people continue to sign their name at the bottom of their posts and threads? We know who you are already. Stop signing your damn posts…

On another day this week I found something in the classifieds that gave me a good laugh. Someone was advertising their bumping services. “Active bumper for hire” the thread stated. Has the game really come to this? Do we really need to hire people to keep our topics bumped? If so, sign me up. I’ll bump the shit out of your thread for some cash. It’s easier then clicking on crimes and I don’t have to worry about getting put in jail.

As the week continued on I noticed a thread where someone was looking for a co-boss for their crew. So what’s the requirement for such a prestigious position? Just send this guy a BM. I mean really? Hi, send me a BM if you are interested and you can be my co-boss and we can make a crew and live happily ever after. Talk about sad. Might be the first time I’ve seen this one. To be honest, you probably don’t deserve a crew spot if you have to recruit your own council from the forums.

Speaking of crew spots, like normal we saw some crews change their names and be sold and such. Is that really important? No. When you have a ridiculous amount of crew spots, 30 being the current number, you can pretty much expect to see a revolving door of new crews. Someone needs to be slapped silly for making that decision. I can picture BSF sitting at his computer debating this issue now… “10 crew spots make it more challenging for people to get in crews and make the spots more valuable. Let’s change that to 379 crew spots. Subtract all of the dupes and each and every person who plays can have their own crew.” Then again, I can’t wait to see some of the retarded crew names that will appear over the course of this round on the statistics page.

Finally, where is Andy? Our beloved Moderator has gone missing in action. He was last seen around the game 11 days ago. Where oh where could he be? Many possibilities come to mind. Maybe he was abducted by aliens. Maybe he was kidnapped by beautiful women. Maybe he was viciously attacked by gummy bears. Maybe he went on the television show Survivor. Haha… I can picture that one. “Our next contestant, Andy, is a Moderator on the ever so popular internet game Bootleggers.” Imagine the publicity we could get. Whatever the reason may be, it is for now unexplained. If you do stumble across Andy in a local pub or shopping center, please contact a Bootleggers Moderator immediately…

But enough with discussing Bootleggers and the forums. Let’s talk about real life. Let’s talk about Tiger Woods. Can you say, plaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaya? I always admired Tiger for the way he dominated the game of golf. Didn’t realize he had so much game off the course. The only thing left to say is that if the rumors are true, he hasn't been wrapping a certain tool up up. I’d suggest he ask Trojan, Durex or LifeStyles for a sponsorship to supplement his Nike income.

Finally I will finish this up by admitting that this week the girlfriend made me go see The Twilight Saga: New Moon. To be honest, it wasn’t actually a bad movie. I do have a suggestion though for the rest of these movies. Less half naked werewolves and pretty boy vampires please! I’d prefer about two hours of Alice Cullen (Ashley Greene) doing anything. She could be reading the dictionary for all I care. For Christmas, I'm hoping she comes down my chimney and bites me. Twice. That is, if Tiger Woods doesn’t beat me to her. That

That ladies and gentlemen, is the ugly truth. As always I would like to take a moment to thank each of you for taking the time to read our articles, leave feedback and rate them. We wouldn’t have The Buzz if we didn’t have dedicated readers.